water weight.

Water Weight. You, my friend, are the best and the worst thing in my life right now. After my four day modified juice cleanse, I was down a quick and relatively easy 4 pounds. I felt uhh-mazing at Zinzi, could’ve been better as always, but I was very happy (I didn’t even have to wear Spanx)! At this point in time, women everywhere are praising you, Water Weight. But then a dark cloud rolled in and you betrayed me…WHY YOU COME BACK SO FAST? Huh? Huh? Huhhhh?! [I purposely left out the “did” in that question for effect – go back and read it the way I wrote it if you happened to instinctively correct my grammar].

It happened like this, you see, I was strict for four measly days and felt great. On Sunday I knew I needed to eat but I didn’t go nuts – a turkey sandwich, some grilled chicken, and a yogurt. That night it’s obvious that I drank but for all the hype, I can’t say that it was any worse than what a normal Saturday night would be for those of you with standard drinking habits. Monday, I’ll admit was a bit much. A bar crawl through Dupont and Georgetown beginning at 1:30pm and ending around midnight or so…I think? But again, chicken and broccoli, 3 wings, and a couple of bites of a grilled cheese that I shared with someone. I even had JUICE that day! But still, I get it – that’s a lot of calories in liquid form. Tuesday, as hung over as I was, I drank lots of water and had more chicken and broccoli. By Wednesday, according to the scale (I hate scales), I was back to the same weight as I was before the juice cleanse.

Great. So one battle was kinda won – I felt great at Zinzi – but what about the war? This is beyond Zinzi, beyond Mexico, beyond next Friday, this is my entire life here, people! What am I going to do? Juice for four days every time I have an event and then go back up to the weight I started at? Not cute. Not healthy. Not happening. That also doesn’t address the issue that I stated from the beginning that is my ultimate struggle – getting back on the wagon when my routine is rocked. Yeah I could be a strict juicer (people do it) but what happens when I go away on vacation and I don’t have a juicer? Or it’s Christmas and there’s a big meal to be had and I’m in New Jersey (aka out of my routine)? So what’s the solution? I believe it might have to be ejercicio. Mehhhh. Of course the solution is ejercicio. I need to do some more exercising.

I get interesting workout ideas from Pinterest. Sometimes I read workout plans or ideas on there that seem so simple and I wonder why I never thought of that. For example, one way I like to switch it up, especially when a 3-5 mile run on the treadmill seems like the most daunting task in the world, is to mix in circuit work with the running. I run the first mile usually between 6.0 and 6.3 and then run each 1/2 mile after that anywhere from 6.3-6.8, sometimes pushing myself up to 7.0 or beyond for quarter miles, etc. It’s not a perfect science but it doesn’t need to be. In between each 1/2 mile I get off the treadmill for 10 push-ups, 25 squats, and 30 abs something or others. This helps me get through the miles on the treadmill faster and harder than I would if I had to run them straight through. I have a few other exercises that I’ve printed that I’ll try out this week and post about next week for you.

Family: I need to work out while I’m in New Jersey for Christmas. Make sure I do it. Thanks. Love you. Mean it.

So last Friday, December 13th, three days into the juicing, this is what I looked like:


I learned a few lessons after taking these pictures last Friday:

1. I need to exercise because I want the definition in my body that exercise gives me. I was down 3 pounds in this picture but I still look pretty much the same because I hadn’t tightened anything up.

2. I may need to choose an additional outfit to take pictures in aka more #selfies. Why? Because I was thinking about it – my goal weight is 10 lbs lighter, not 20, 30, 40, 50 lbs lighter which is going to be difficult to see no matter what. In that picture I’m less than 10 lbs away from where I want to be and it looks almost identical to the one from the week before (please, correct me if I’m wrong). I noticed a difference in how my jeans fit and how my work clothes fit but when I put that get-up on for the picture I looked the same. So we’ll see, maybe some jeans and a tank top will help us all see my progress better.

Anyway, Sassarella Says, Water Weight, I forgive you. I’m sorry that I did away with all of your hard work by replacing juice with vodka for two days and I promise to give you some support this week. Sass also just wants to say that as great as all of this is, it sucks. This whole thing sucks. Trying to keep my eye on the prize:

To have this:


When I’m here:


About sasssays

The trials, the tribulations, and the triumphs of a sassy and sophisticated 20 something girl
This entry was posted in detox, it's a girl thang, life as I know it, the pursuit of happiness and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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