Hey, Have You Heard? Sassarella is Back, Biotches.

In the last month I have only sat down to write twice and both times came up with something so mediocre that I didn’t even bother to post it. I’ve been in a rut. Someone asked me where Sassarella has been and the answer that came immediately to mind was, “I have nothing to say right now.” I’m always working and when I’m not working I’m either at yoga or partying, neither of which typically inspire too many blog posts. However, in the last month I have heard a lot of things that have either made me laugh, cry, or simply struck a cord….

“Can you help me? I’ve never had a boyfriend so I’m not sure how these boyfriend style jeans are supposed to look. Do you like them?” ~ most adorable girl in her mid-twenties shopping at Loft

“I need to call my boyfriend, he’ll know what to do. I’m gonna have to transfer! My parents are going to kill me! I’m supposed to be watching after my sister and now she’s here getting stitches. It is a big deal! It is a big deal! You don’t understand, people are laughing at me, but you don’t understand. My parents went to Vanderbilt and I go to GW, which is so much worse. They’re going to make me transfer!!!” ~ girl at the GW emergency room in the next bed over from me, uncontrollably sobbing of course

“YOU CAN’T SIT WITH US!!!!!” ~ Dani, Brittany, and myself

“Have you ever thought about what protects our hearts?
Just a cage of rib bones and other various parts.
So it’s fairly simple to cut through the mess,
and stop the muscle that makes us confess” ~ Ingrid Michaelson, Breakable

“You have so many weapons, most of which
you don’t even know are weapons.” ~ Ceze to the Eeze

“Looks like boo is duncan hines!!” ~ Mensing
“Fools in love, are there any creatures more pathetic?
….I should know because this fool’s in love again.” ~ Inara George, Fools in Love

“I think you’re phenomenal.” ~ Wouldn’t you like to know
“What time did we leave last night?”
“It must have been pretty late, the bar was definitely closed.”
“Yeah well I mean one bartender gave me a ride and you went home with the other one….so yeah, I’d say it was pretty late.”
“WOW, are we classy or what?!” ~ take a wild guess
“WOO WOO WAHHHHH!” ~ Oscar on my love, Zack Ryder, getting hurt on Monday Night Raw
“I’m the mayor of Love in Homeless Places, bitch.” ~ Me to Gus
“However far away, I will always love you.” ~ Adele, Lovesong
“So, you’re pretty much being the worst person alive. Yes you are.” ~ Brittany
“Can I keep you?” ~ Confidential

“It was so nice to meet your parents. Are they married a long time because you can really see the connection. All three of you seemed very well connected, it was nice.” ~ my manager at Loft

“I find you so much less attractive now
because I know you slept with him.” ~ B.K.
“She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. When I think back, things that I wasn’t happy about had to line up for us to be together and I couldn’t be happier now that they did. I really believe I am the luckiest guy in the world” ~ If it’s not a pail, then it’s gotta be a….
“I could start fires with what I feel for you” ~ David Ramirez, Fires
“I want your boobs. I’m gonna play my sexy time play list. Can us four get a house together?!” ~ Car Bomb Kate 2008
And finally, “history repeats itself, why is Brady wearing Uggs for men?!” ~ Missy Modell, The GMEN Are Back Again

Sassarella Says….I haven’t been particularly happy or unhappy recently. I’m in a state of limbo, teetering from happy one day and frustrated or upset the next. This is partly because I’m exhausted, but also because…because…of a lot of things. I’m not loving my retail job, Rhino has slowed down since football ended, and I just can’t seem to get my love life under control. I act irrationally and impulsively. I miss my Jersey friends, I miss Luc, and I want this one particular job really badly but I know it’s not going to happen over night. I’m not happy that I rarely have a day to myself, therefore I don’t write blog posts and my apartment is always mess. However, I am happy when I am with my friends and we’re belting Taylor Swift songs at Kandi & Pipers Mac N Chz Palace or when we’re re-capping a great night. I am happy that the GIANTS won the Super Bowl and on Friday nights when I get to bartend. I’m happy when he’s tickling me at 7am and when the guys are teasing me about nothing. I am happy that my parents came to town, that Pinkberry always hits the spot, and that I’m finally getting back into shape since the holiday season is over. As I sit here and think about it, it’s not that I need to teeter the seesaw to happy because like I said, I’m not unhappy, but rather I’d like to tip it over to stability. I am happy when I am overall stable with spurts of spontaneity. Hopefully one of these days I will have just that.

About sasssays

The trials, the tribulations, and the triumphs of a sassy and sophisticated 20 something girl
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2 Responses to Hey, Have You Heard? Sassarella is Back, Biotches.

  1. Lauren says:

    Dear Sassarella, I think what you need is a trip back to Jersey. Your friends miss you. Your parents miss you. Sona misses you. Lifetime misses you. Luc misses you. Nonna's misses you and probably even the owner of Nonna's misses you. The Short Hills Mall misses you. Joe's misses you. I can think of a few Jersey boys that I am sure miss you. But most importantly….I MISS YOU!! I know I am being selfish but right now I am okay with that because I need my partner in crime because life isn't the same without you. So make the trip as soon as possible and I will be waiting in my little black dress to hit up Sona. And if that doesn't work, I will try and make a trip down to visit as soon as I am done studying for this stupid exam. Btw keep posting because it allows me to catch up on your life and take a break from the books. Miss and Love you Sass!!<3 Lauren

  2. Mom says:

    Ditto!!! Ditto!!! Ditto!! Go with your bad self Laur!!! Tell that Sassarella a thing or two!! xxoo

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