Alright, alright, alright (Dazed and Confused style). So first of all, please notice the nice box above this post that asks you to submit your email address. If you’d like to be notified by email (and I don’t know why you wouldn’t) when I write a new post, type in your email address and !VOiLA! you will receive email notifications. Also, I’m hearing feedback that some people are not aware that any text that is underlined and in a different color is a link, so click on them 🙂
I learned how to add that feature from a certain New Mexican soon to be in South Beach on his way to becoming another Jewish lawyer, so thank you. This future Jewish lawyer also started writing a blog today and I am SO EXCITED about it! Read it if ya know what’s good for ya (this is a link to his blog). I’m very demanding today, sorry but I’m not sorry. Anyway in his first post, primarily about “hope and promise,” he also makes a very good point about relationships. To quote him, “Without strong relationships life becomes much harder to survive.” Plain and simple. I am going to take his sentiment in a similar yet different approach.
This past week I have been running outside in my little town of “Flo Po.” At first, I am immediately struck by how much I prefer running in DC than I do in the ‘burbs of NJ. In DC there is so much to look at and a variety of routes to take. I can admire the city from the waterfront, explore new neighborhoods, and feed off of the energy of the hustle and bustle of city life. I am also considering the social aspect. I had a community of people at my fingertips and because I was covering so much ground, I would run by all the pockets of places that I know people. I miss waving to the many police officers, classmates, and co-workers while I was out on the streets in my Nike sneaks (someone put that in a rap song). In FP, I am usually the only pedestrian which leaves me straining my eyes trying to see into car windows looking for someone I might know.
I got a little worried about this situation but as the week continued, I realized that I may have been too quick to judge my hometown. I remember two summers ago I was running on Brooklake Road and out of no where BOOM torrential rain. One of the delivery guys at Nonna’s drove around looking for me, another minivan pulled up next to me and the woman inside said, “Hey, you’re the Nonna’s girl aren’t you? Do you want a ride?” and even my neighbors stopped to make sure I would get home safely. Now I’m back and what I thought would be the difficult task of re-building my community is proving not to be so difficult. First of all, just being back at Nonna’s to eat I am reminded of how much I love the small town feel….I saw my Butthead Friend who is, whatever, I guess no longer a butthead (for the time being), Gabbie was there, all of the waitresses and pizza guys are still there, and a funny thing happened while I was trying to find parking. I was blasting “Lights” by Ellie Goulding (obviously) when I pull up (topless lol) to a group of guys yelling at me and the one says ,”Great song!” I asked him if he was being serious or sarcastic and he says, “No I’m so serious. Ellie Goulding! I love it and no one knows it yet. You gotta get the “Bassnectar Remix!” [Like I don’t have it already, yeah right]. I told him it was coming on next and as I pulled away I heard him yell, “And she’s driving a BMW, I think I might love her, I LOVE YOU!” And today I received a text message from a middle school friend saying, “I just saw you running, go girl!”
Ya see, my community is still here I just have to re-build it. I like being a townie and knowing people around me. In relation to life in general, my idol Kelly Cutrone, phrases it as “finding your tribe.” To quote her book, If You Have to Cry Go Outside, “Your tribe members, whether people gifted to you by the universe or people you seek out and pay, will not only add something unique and essential to your journey but make it much more colorful and fun” (25). They are like-minded people who have similar interests or connections to people who do. They offer advice and they bring out those “Ah-ha!” moments. I’m building my tribe. I have my Ya-Ya’s of course, but I am also finding those people who will guide and support me throughout the journey. They can be friends, co-workers, bosses, or the stranger sitting next to me on a random train.
And speaking of journey, please stop asking me what I’m doing now that I’ve graduated. I am helping my parents at their office for awhile, then spending some time in California with a tribe member who is going to hone in on my skills and interests, and then I’m going to come back here and apply to jobs in NJ, NYC, etc. I know I’m being sassy because the people who ask me if I have a job are only asking out of interest and because if I was, oh I don’t know, say going to the University of Miami for law school, interning at AOL, or deferring a job at PWC while I finish graduate school then obviously I’d want to tell them that…..but I’m not. What am I doing? I’m building my g.d. tribe! So lay off me. I’m seeking out and stumbling upon the people who are going to help make my life abso-effing-lutely fantastic. I didn’t try and fail so don’t shake your head or roll your eyes or look at me sympathetically when I say I haven’t started a CAREER yet, big deal. I didn’t apply nor did I want to. I’m letting my brain relax and I have no doubt that in a few short months when I do get a “real job” that it will kick your job’s butt 😉 Ok, maybe that was being dramatic, but it will kick butt none-the-less.
ANYWAY, the point of all of this ranting and raving is that it is so necessary to hold on tightly to the people you want in your tribe. Who is going to help elevate you to the next level? Who is going to keep your focus and who is going to let you forget your focus from time to time? Who are the people you can call upon when you need to pick their brain for wisdom and knowledge? Who makes up the group of people, your tribe, that positively affects your life? I’m telling you now though, it’s a two-way street. Expect that the members of your tribe will need or want you to contribute in some way to their journey as well so get ready. I’m amped up and ready to go so let’s do this shizz called life.